Monday 9 January 2017


Roger Noons


a pint of orange juice and lemonade


    ‘The next time the referee blows his whistle, I’m going to shove it right up his …’


    ‘Number 3, Whites, you’re still not binding properly. I’m sick of telling you. You’re in the sin bin for ten minutes. Penalty kick to Reds.’

    ‘How long to go ref?’ asked the Whites skipper.

    ‘Four or five minutes.’

    ‘Does that mean I start next season in the bin?’ queried the No. 3.

    ‘Unless you appeal,’ said the referee.

    Using both hands, the prop pulled up her jersey and leant forward displaying a generously-filled sports bra. ‘That appealing enough for you, Ref?’

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