Saturday 17 October 2020

Reductio ad Absurdum


by  Henry Lewi

Angel’s Delight Cocktail (Gun, Triple Sec and Cream)

   It seemed like everywhere I looked I saw Angels.

  Well, they weren’t really angels, it was the name we gave them. Their ship had crash-landed 35 years ago in the relatively deserted Suffolk countryside, and the original crew of 25 aliens had doubled in number to around 50. The aliens who were peaceful in nature, were essentially humanoid in appearance, all had long white hair and deep black eyes. Their distinguishing feature were the  two large wings emerging from their backs which is why they were nicknamed Angels. It transpired that the wings were part of their respiratory system providing a membrane that allowed oxygen to directly access their bloodstream, an evolutionary response to their world whose oxygen levels had progressively fallen over the many millennia of their existence.

  The alien ship, beautifully designed looking like an extended fattened needle with a flattened base, had been one of many launched from their home-world to search for suitable planets for colonization. The alien community had been happy to share their technology with our world, especially the workings of their proton impulse engine, which had allowed them to cross the vast distances of space. The payment was simple, we had to help repair their Needle-Ship and allow them to depart to try and return to their home-world. It had taken 35 years, and the combined efforts of many of the World’s leading Scientists helped by their Angel counterparts to carry out effective repairs on their Needle-ship; which had been nicknamed THE PIN, because of both its appearance and its Proton Impulse Needle Drive.

  My role as Senior Scientific Adviser to both the British Government and the United Nations Security Council, was to inform the Angel Community that their ship was now ready, and to supervise their departure.

 Some months later as the Angels filed onto their ship, I looked around the Angel community and idly wondered “How Many Angels Can You Fit in the Hold of a PIN?” 


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