The Art Critic
The fairy took one look at the concrete monstrosity of a statue put up to represent Tinkerbell and blasted it to smithereens with a quick twitch of her wand.
It was bad enough humans didn't really believe in fairy kind anymore but there was no way she would tolerate such a horrible depiction of the noblest of the magical species.
So she didn't and considered it the finest piece of critical art analysis ever seen on Earth. It was just a shame she couldn't boast about it. Very few would believe in her to be able to believe her at all. She wished she could change that and teach humans to respect their betters. She wasn't allowed to grant her own wishes. It would be chaos she was told.
She sighed. What it would've been was fun!
But then fairies weren’t supposed to indulge in that either, or so she’d been told.
She smiled. There was a lot the authorities didn’t know despite all their magical capabilities. If folk were determined to do something, they’d find a way. It was one of the few things she understood about humanity given they shared the same trait.
And now time to clear off and leave people wondering what happened to “their” Tinkerbell.
The fairy vanished. The very sharp of hearing might have just heard a slight laugh on the breeze as she did so.
Getting Lost
Where the hell was he now?
Goodness knew his sat nav had sent him in some strange directions in her time. He still hadn't forgiven her for trying to send him the wrong way up a slip road. She'd told him the way so nicely too.
Well, she wasn't catching him out with her tricks again. No way! He'd been checking the route before setting off. If her route didn't match his, tough. Like Sinatra, he would do it his way.
He thought back. Yes, he'd been looking for The Oak as he used pubs as landmarks. What he had found was a horse chestnut. He grimaced. He could've sworn he'd only winged it but that dent in his Audi would take some shifting. Still, that could be sorted out later.
Gloomy place this, he thought. Won't get many visitors until they tart the place up a bit.
He sniffed. There was a distinct smell of rotten eggs. Oh yes, that would probably be the sulphur.
Now if he could only figure out where the hell he was, he would move on.
Skating on Thin Ice
There's a novelty, he thought, hell has frozen over.
Did it have something to do with his arrival? One look at her face did give that impression.
Where he expected anger, all she was sending his way was a warmth that would make the Arctic seem hot. Glacial did not begin to cover it.
Still he knew he was justified in trying to put things right. He hadn't meant to damage her precious book. He hadn't realised just how much it meant to her. He knew now though. She'd told him in no uncertain terms.
He would chalk this up to experience and never do it again. How best to tell her? Words weren't his forte. Ah yes! This would do it. It always did.
Barney whined, wagged his collie tail, and held up a paw - his best cute look.
She smiled.
Jack of All Trades
Nothing was said about this happening in the manual. Jack blinked. He hadn't been mistaken. The purple dinosaur was there and it didn't look happy. Still, Jack knew he had to report these things so he tapped his supervisor's number out on his mobile.
It took several minutes for Jack to stop repeating his description of the beast and longer still for the supervisor to stop swearing. The purple dinosaur was munching its way through what had been the supermarket.
At least demolishing the contents of the butcher's counter was keeping the creature occupied and its attention away from Jack. He felt this was good news. Jack's supervisor felt differently - his cousin was the butcher at that supermarket. It was made clear Jack was disposable.
Jack hung up. If he didn't resolve this, he'd be eaten or, if he survived, sacked. If he did resolve it, the supervisor wouldn't mind having the call cut off.
Jack saw the dinosaur had finished the meat. The next aisle contained the veg.
It won’t want that, Jack thought. I never do. Still, if a creature comes through from the next world, it can jolly well go back there again and at speed. We don't want his sort here.
‘Come here, boy.’ Jack did a quick check. ‘Sorry, girl. This world is no place for you.’
Jack took a flare out from his tool belt and fired it above the dinosaur. It roared and ran back through the gaping hole in dimensions its body had blocked from Jack's view.
Jack sighed. He'd have to fix that too.
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