Rikha was born as
a girl about eighteen years ago. Her father used to call her saying, "Dear
daughter, come to my lap...and I used to run to him.
She was born into a family which was
economically and socially maintained by her father, Avarnath, who used to work
in a small jewellery shop in my local city, Ghosi. She had not only one or two
dreams, but innumerable, which always haunted her heart and mind. She had her mother Sheelam, her brother
Vayank, and her elder sister Vandini in her family, who had no fewer dreams
than hers. Her father was the only person to earn and maintain the expenses of
the family and fulfil their dreams.
They used to eat, sleep, play and do
together and enjoyed our lives as pleasantly as monarchs, as they were paragons
of contentment.
But a tragedy overwhelmed their family with
the untimely and sudden death of her father due to cardiac arrest. With this,
they lost everything in their lives – their hope, joy, light, patronage, and
everything. He is no longer with them, and all her dreams have been shattered.
After his demise, they suffered enough – a
lot of problems they faced in their lives. Economic crises to maintain the
expenses of the family, and the sense of loneliness and helplessness surrounded
all around them. They pined even for a shower of human mercy and compassion –
and in this condition, a few kith and kin came to help them.
She sleeps alone and dreams, "...dad
has brought toffees for us...biscuits for us...he is giving to us...he is
playing with us..."
But all this is a dream, and this will
never be true in any situation in the world. Thinking about this, she
pines...She sighs...She weeps..., but she regains much more power and ability
to survive and do something for herself and humanity.
Sometimes, she dreams at night,
"...there are thorns all around me...I am sleeping on it. The roof will
fall upon me, and some has come to fire on me...there are incurable wounds on
my body..."
This frequently happened to her. And her
family members consoled her, saying, "This will never happen..."
Then a series of social separations began.
Her brother went to her cousin to study, and with his help, her sister also
went with her cousin to study. Her mother always sighs over the loss of her
father. And she alone lived in the same house, which was built by her father.
Her mother, Sheelam, used to say, “You’ve
to care for yourself, facing all the troubles. I’m not in a situation to guide
you...”
Thus, she remains lost in the tragedy which
destroyed their dreams and future to prosper.
Her sister also chose her own path in such
a tragic situation, and she left her alone.
Her sister, Vandini, said, “I am going to
live and study with the cousins with their help...”
After some months of her departure, her
brother Vayank also left home with his cousin to live and study with them.
Hence, Rikha became alone and lived in the same state of loneliness, bearing
all the troubles around her.
While departed, Vayank consoled her,
saying, “Don’t worry. Live at home and study here. You will be in my heart, and
I will be in your heart as sister and brother...”
Some years ago, saying this, they, who
lived, ate and played with her, departed from her, awarding tears in her
delicate heart and leaving her at home. She felt agony but tolerated this
because she understood their helplessness.
When her sister and brother went for their
studies with their cousins, multiple ideas began to haunt her mind, and I
dreamt, "...I am sleeping alone on a barren land. There is none...all
around me naked rocks and mountains and dried grasses...there is no way for me
to return to my home..."
Now, there is none to console her.
Thus, her heart turned into stone. Since
then, she has lived alone at home waiting for the final decision of her Fate.
Sometimes, she sees stars at daylight and in the image of stars, I see the
nakedness of the world, which lacks mercy and compassion in need. She
frequently remembers the philosophic, thought-provoking and didactic lines
written by Matthew Arnold to console myself:
Ah, love, let us be true
To one another! for the world, which seems
To lie before us like a land of dreams,
So various, so beautiful, so new,
Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light,
Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;
And we are here as on a darkling plain
Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,
Where ignorant armies clash by night.
The above lines show the reality of the
world and give them the light to live happily in the same situation that
Almighty Fate awards them. She lives in the same situation as the Fate register
allows them and encourages all mankind to live in present, whatever one has.
Everyone must know and understand that the world is not a bed of roses, but a
dim and dark one where no formula is fully applicable to lead a happy life, and
suddenly anything wrong may happen to anyone anywhere, whether one is a monarch
or a beggar.
She frequently remembers the days and
repents for some time, and later she stands alone with double power to survive
and to do something for the betterment of mankind.
These lines console her for some time, and
again, she enters the same state of isolation and loneliness. She began to
recall her past with her father, who used to come in every evening with toffees
and biscuits for her and her brother and her sister:
“... Rikha...Vandini...Vayank ...come and
take toffees...”
They ran towards him and clasped his feet
with our hands, taking as much as we could as soon as possible, saying,
“...Give us much more, my dad...”
Her dad offered all the edibles with
fatherly love and choice. She used to eat – and she eats now, but the taste was
different, which he offered by his hands and love and choice. This is the
difference which she obviously sees and feels. The joy, love and human bond
which she felt in her life with him was never experienced after his demise.
When evening comes, she waits for him, but
instead of him, darkness comes and envelopes her in its realm for hours. She
waits for him in the morning, when he used to get her raised, shrill whistles
of the vehicles come, but not the voice of her father. Thus, she is enveloped
in the darkness at night and during the day in despair and loneliness. This is the cycle of the tragedy which she
faces.
How pleasant was the lap of her father! How
tasty were the toffees and sweets offered by him! How fatherly was his love and
passion for her! Whenever and wherever she feels or sees his voice or face, she
is compelled to recall memories of bliss with him and the current miserable
situation in lack of him, she finds only and only darkness all around her – and
a sense of isolation and despair. The vent she tries to forget, but she is
helpless to forget it. She is quite unable to see him back and sit in his lap
for the fatherly love and passion.
Whatever the situation is, however very
miserable, she lives in it expecting that she is one of the luckiest persons in
the world, who weeps and sighs but never bends to her aim to work for the
betterment of herself and mankind.
I feel isolated and despairing. It seems
that there are drops of blood on the walls, furniture, garments, shelves, beds,
and other things in my house. But whenever I am in the lap of Nature, I see
letters of hope, reality, and the parts of Creation even in my tragedy. It
seems that these are the necessities for the continuation of Creation.
She wishes her message communicated to the
world: "Every sorrow is followed by fresh joys – Every joy is followed by
sorrows".
This is the reality in which we all live,
we all face and follow the laws of Nature. This is the law of Nature, and
everyone in the world, whatsoever powerful and influential, has passed through
this divine and natural process to live and survive. No one should look back to
see sorrowful days, but to see a lesson, and everyone should work for the good
of the common people. One’s welfare is hidden in these good deeds for the world
by man.
Now people used to say her a woman, but I
feel and understand...she is a human...she wants to be recognised neither as a
woman nor as a man because it limits us. So, it is better to be recognised as a
human.
Aha! She is sure and hopes the day of joy
will welcome her the next morning, and she will live in the realm of heavenly
bliss, surrounded by pleasures!
Now, she wants everything changed within a
minute – her sorrows turned into bliss and only bliss.
It is night, and she is going to bed. She wishes the next morning,
"Joy and joy all around her...her woes will be gone...bliss will overwhelm
her..."
What a great thing, if it is so!
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