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Thursday, 10 September 2026

Mr. Rhombus by Christian P Jacobson, Hot Chocolate

'I wish for some peace and quiet and a relaxing birthday.' Mr. Rhombus inhaled and held the little cupcake up to his mouth, but the breeze blew out the candle before he could. Frowning, he slouched back into the wooden bench and glanced around at the greenery. A flock of ducks splashing around in the big fountain made him smile. He took a little bite of the cupcake and beamed. Knees wobbling, he slowly rose to his feet. He licked his lips and stuck out his behind, shaking it from side to side. 'Oh, a happy birthday indeed!'

Out of the corner of his eye, Mr. Rhombus saw the family of four, who had been playing catch in the field, looking his way. He froze, sat back down, and turned away. They're probably laughing at me, he thought. The parents waved hello to him, but he didn’t see. Sighing to himself, he stared up into the sky. The clouds blocked out the sun. His gaze lowered once again onto the big fountain and the ducks. One duck was missing. Mr. Rhombus furrowed his brow and leaned forward, looking for that missing duck. She was a few feet from the others, with one foot stuck in some deep mud.

Eyes opened wide, Mr. Rhombus thought to himself, Someone has to help that duck! The family in the field wasn’t very far off. 'Excuse me!' he tried to yell to them. Unfortunately, his tongue slipped and he let out, 'Excuthee!' The family turned around to face him, but he spun his face away and winced. When he opened his eyes, he saw the duck shaking and hopping, trying to dislodge her webbed foot from the mud.

Mr. Rhombus struggled to his feet again and grabbed his four-legged walker. 'But what if she bites me? No, no. She might peck, but ducks can't bite. Well, a peck would still probably hurt!' She flapped her wings at him and quacked louder as he approached. Using the walker for support, he lowered himself to the ground. He reached towards the stuck foot, but pulled back quickly as the duck's bill pinched and ripped the delicate skin on the back of his hand. He wagged a finger at her. 'You know, I could just leave you here by yourself,' he warned. But he tried again. This time the duck quacked, but she didn’t peck. Using his uninjured hand, he pulled away enough of the mud so that the struggling bird could hop out. She honked twice and then jumped into the fountain.

'There we go, little one,' he said, rising to his feet. Holding his throbbing hand, he smiled. Once again, Mr. Rhombus stuck out his behind and shook it back and forth. He closed his eyes and hummed a triumphant tune to himself. When he opened his eyes, he saw the little duck was back in front of him, shaking her tail to his rhythm.

'Look at you!' he said to the dancing duck. 'Okay. Bye-bye now.' But as he tried to walk away, the dancing duck followed. He turned around and shook a finger at her. 'Go!' But she followed. He went around the whole fountain trying to get her off his back, but she danced behind him the whole way. As he approached the bench again, he noticed the family in the field laughing and pointing at him. He stopped and faced the duck. 'I’d like to be alone, please,' he said to her, and was relieved to see her waddle back towards her flock.

She approached her friends and started dancing once again. At first they all watched. After a few seconds, two more joined in, slowly at first, and then in time. The others quacked at them and flew away. The three dancing ducks came back up to Mr. Rhombus, who watched with an open mouth. 'That’s it, I’m going home, where I can have some peace.' As he walked away, three ducks followed behind, all shaking their tails.

Mr. Rhombus turned over his shoulder and glanced at the ducks. He sped up, determined now to shake them. The distance was growing between them. Still focused on the ducks behind

him, he crashed into the fountain and fell face-first into the water. Thrusting himself upwards, he let out a cry. Tears fell off his wrinkled cheeks. 'Oh, look at me! How embarrassing! Surely you want nothing to do with me!' he shouted. But the ducks stood there, staring at him, still wagging those tails. It really was a funny dance, if he was being honest. A little laugh sprang out through the sobs. Sighing, and then inhaling deeply, Mr. Rhombus let himself slip back under the water.

Holding his breath, he looked up at the sky. The sunbeams now broke through the swirling clouds. A V-formation of birds flew by, and much higher up an airplane passed in the same direction. The three ducks hopped into the fountain, and softly paddled their webbed feet above him. He rose up out of the water, and smiled. The nearby family had come running over to help. 'Are you okay?' they yelled to him. He laughed and waved away their open hands. 'Yes, thank you! I’m just playing with the ducks!'


Christian Jacobson is a 28 year old restaurant and construction worker, going to nursing school and hoping for a future in writing. Based in Orlando, but having lived all over Florida, he enjoys raw, naturalistic stories.

Did you enjoy the story? Would you like to shout us a coffee? Half of what you pay goes to the author the other half goes to expenses e.g. Maintaining the web site and setting up The Best of Café Lit book each year.  


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